Wednesday, September 07, 2005

Couldn't fit the word count

From St. Barry's gamer of last night's disappointing 4-2 loss to the Florida Marlins:

Such is the flawed nature of the teams in this wild-card race that a has-been veteran, Valdez, faced off against a kid who had never appeared in a major league game before, Rasner. The more surprising participant was Rasner, a 24-year-old who spent the entire season with Class AA
Harrisburg and was forced into the situation because of injuries to starters Ryan Drese and Tony Armas Jr.

Actually, add some elipses(es?) here, because there's a bit more information that didn't make it into the game story:

. . . because of injuries to starters Ryan Drese and Tony Armas Jr., as well as transactions by general manager Jim Bowden that rid the team of its back-end-of-the-rotation pitching depth, including Tomo Ohka, Zach Day, Claudio Vargas, and Sunny Kim. The first two had run-ins with
manager Frank Robinson, and the latter two were let go for no compensation whatsoever.

There, it reads a little more completely now.

Mark Zuckerman of the WashTimes equates Rasner's start with Matt White's a couple weeks back. Zuckerman, like St. Barry, also focused heavily on the Nats' anemic attack against journeyman opponent Ismael Valdez (not Valdes anymore) and noted that the crowd of just under 25,000, well, stunk:

It was the second-smallest home crowd of the year for the Nationals, ahead only the 23,966 that turned out April 18 to see them play these same Marlins -- and it underscored several key points. First, school's back in session. Second, football season is upon us. And third, this town doesn't appear ready to declare the Nationals (72-67) back in the race just yet.

Let's hope tonight changes that perception; all the guys have to do is beat Dontrelle Willis. The Nats' starter? No, it's not a raw rookie. This time, it's their own journeyman, John Halama.

No sweat.


The last two games, has carried the Marlins' TV feed. The announcers are nothing special, but the commercials blow MASN's package out of the water and back in again:

1) The meal-ticket spot, without doubt, belongs to a car dealer named "Maroone" (pronounced "MA-ROONEY!!!"). Think car dealer comercial, Dan Marino, theme to Ghostbusters ("When you need a car, van or truck, who you gonna call? MA-ROONEY!!!") There are also variations without Marino.

2) A commercial for an auto parts dealer in which a monkey apparently passes gas. Pure hilarity!

3) A Baccardi commercial in which a midget dances with two supermodels. Genuine class.

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